Well, there’s nothing like being in lock-down in your own house during an epidemic to put a crimp in the whole “oikofuge” thing. So the Oikofuge is at present forced to revive his dormant childhood oikotropism. Expect more posts about words and books and model-making for the next few months, and very little about walking and travel.
The current state of affairs has also rather overtaken my plans for an April 1st post, on the theme of self-isolation advice, which I cheerily knocked together a few weeks ago. But here it is anyway. Keep safe out there.
As a means of improving the morale of the people of the United Kingdom in these difficult times, Her Majesty’s Government has identified an additional group of people we ask to enter voluntary self-isolation. To find out if you fall into this new and important category, please respond honestly to the questions below:
Have you, in the last two months, made any of the following statements, either verbally or in writing, under such circumstances that another person might be exposed to the content:
- It was all cooked up in a secret Chinese/American laboratory, you know
- I blame the 5G phone masts, myself
- It rose quickly, it could go just as quickly
- Gargling with bleach will stop you getting it
- Rinsing your nostrils regularly with saline will stop you getting it
- Sipping water every 15 minutes will stop you getting it
- Rubbing your body with alcohol will stop you getting it
- Vitamin C / garlic / essential oils /colloidal silver will stop you getting it
- Hot-air hand dryers will sterilize your hands and stop you getting it
- Hot baths will destroy the virus in your body and stop you getting it
- I certainly wouldn’t risk Chinese food at present
- I certainly wouldn’t risk Corona beer at present
If you have answered “yes” to any of these questions, the Government advises you to enter a period of self-isolation for six months, in the first instance, and subject to review at the end of that period. For the purposes of this advice, “self-isolation” includes a complete cessation of all social media activity, and the use of telephone, email and messaging services strictly for business or emergency purposes only.
Because, frankly, people have enough to put up with at present without being exposed to your nonsense, too.